This week I turned 45! Did I really just write that? Yes. Yes I did. I don’t feel 45 but my birth certificated doesn’t lie. I have to admit, I have certain expectations for the day. Shouldn’t all birthdays be special?
First, the morning happy birthday song in bed didn’t come. This is a tradition my in my home. Next, my toddler had a bad cold with a nonstop runny nose so she wasn’t happy and we didn’t get out to the library like we usually do on that day. Then I cancelled dinner out because I didn’t want to get my babysitter sick. It was looking like a pretty typical Monday in fact. Kind of deflating.
But here’s the thing, I felt sorry for myself for a few moments and then it passed. I was thinking about what I had instead. Several friends and family members called, texted or emailed happy birthdays too me. I got flowers from my in-laws and hubby. My toddler, with her tiny hands, gave me an oh so brief shoulder massage (before asking me to give her one) and we ended up doing take out from the very restaurant we would have gone to that night. Even better, we watched Bohemian Rhapsody! I’ve been dying to see that – I love Freddy Mercury.
So, no I didn’t get out that day except to play in the yard in the afternoon with my little runny-nose girl and take the recycling to the curb. I didn’t get bombarded with happy birthday messages in social media and there was no birthday “cake” in bed. But I ended up with a day that was unique and filled with light.
Here’s what I know helped to change my mindset.
- My Morning Mantra – I have two actually. One is “I expand in Love, Abundance and Success as I inspire others to do the same” this is from Gay Hendricks’s book The Big Leap. The second is “I am capable of living my dream now”. These two mantras have put me in a mindset of abundance instead of scarcity. Even though I still slip into the scarcity mindset every now and then (because I’m so not perfect, and I don’t pretend to be) I more often than not default to an abundance mindset.
- Meditation – I’m not the most patient person with myself and so to sit for something like 10 minutes without my mind going in every direction just doesn’t happen. That’s why I use Headspace. This app is awesome and helps keep my mind focused. Right now I’m on the Happiness series and I love the first one. It describes a tiny light (of happiness) starting from the heart and that glow growing bigger and bigger until in encompasses my house, neighborhood, island and beyond. This fills me with happy warmth and makes me more aware of spreading that feeling to others around me. Again – I’m not perfect, sometimes I just try to survive the moment but the shift in how I feel at the end of the day is great.
- Tapping – Also called Emotional Freedom Technique, uses acupressure points and mantra to help balance energy that’s out of balance. It’s also used to treat pain though I haven’t tried EFT for that. You can find a great how to video on Gabby Bernstein’s website. I do this most mornings to help ease my anxiety and to keep focused on my goals for myself and business. I spent so many years (more like decades) in a state of fight or flight that it’s hard to ditch the feeling and just be at peace in the moment. This has helped.
You might think, there’s just not enough time in the day for all of this. I totally get it. But really, you can do all this in as little as 10 minutes in the morning. In fact, you can do these throughout the day as well if you’re feeling stressed or just out of synch with those around you. They key is to be as consistent as possible. A little each day.
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